Rethink tolerance: 20 ways we put up with disrespect, abuse and nonsense

Are you tolerating all kinds of disrespect that you wish would disappear?

Tolerating things you don’t like was a necessary skill when you were young. Think about it. Babies and young children, in loving families, still MUST tolerate all kinds of “mistreatment” that they do not understand or appreciate. (Have you ever met a two-year-old?)

Kids growing up in dysfunctional families learn to tolerate not only the perceived injustices, but actual abuse and neglect.

The problem is, tolerance for perceived and actual mistreatment becomes so familiar that we end up (subconsciously) accepting it for the long haul. We don’t stop to realize that, as adults, there are OPTIONS.

We tolerate all kinds of abuse from other people, families, communities and governments. Nothing you can do about it. Just live with it (sigh). These are the sentiments that rule the day and create suffering for hapless sheeple all around the world.

While tolerance is most often described as a good thing, at best it is a two-edged sword.
On the one hand, we all should learn to tolerate our differences respectfully. Every race, culture, community, family and individual deserves to have differences appreciated. This kind of tolerance for differences is critical to our very survival.

On the other hand, tolerance can be your worst enemy. Some of us are helplessly tolerating a tremendous amount of disrespect and setting ourselves up for lifelong misery. In this case, tolerance is your worst enemy.

Still, it can be feel nearly impossible let go of the familiar suffering, draw the line and demand respect. Here are 20 ways we tolerate endless misery, from the individual and cultural perspectives.

Cultural suffering that is widely tolerated:

1. A poisoned food supply
Food and water are intentionally poisoned with toxic chemicals such as pesticides, fluoride and genetically modified organisms.

2. Mass corruption in government
Criminals and thugs are regularly elected and re-elected to positions of power in governments around the world.

3. Mass corruption in the corporate world
Thieves and thugs in business regularly collude with the cohorts in government while people keep buying their products.

4. Lying and deception in the mainstream media
We sit at our TVs and listen to puppet heads neglect to mention the most relevant facts about current events.

5. Abuse of holistic businesses and practices
If you are a holistic business, you need to be mildly paranoid about the benefits of your product or service even though there are no harmful side effects. If you don’t watch out, you’ll be fined or imprisoned.

In fact, you may not even need to make any claims in order to be fined and imprisoned!

Meanwhile, pharmaceutical companies come right out and claim that their product endangers your health and may very well kill you. These are the folks who get the money and support from higher ups.

6. Vaccination abuse
Your right to spare your baby a toxin-laden vaccination is slipping away. In fact, you may be called a murderer if you refuse a vaccination.

7. Internet freedom under attack
There are those who would regulate your freedom of speech by monitoring what you post online and restricting information that they disagree with.

8. Your email – no longer private.
Your email account is routinely hacked and scrutinized by the government, a clear invasion of privacy.

9. Forced psychiatric drugging
Psychiatrists and legislators would like to force psychiatric drugging and imprison people who seek treatment for problems. If you don’t want meds or even electric shock treatment, then you may be forced into it or physically confined.

10. Truth tellers and legitimate conspiracy theorists and jailed in prisons and hospitals
When someone learns the truth and has the nerve to come out with it, they are destroyed. Check out this article about five truth tellers and what they endured.

Individual tolerance for unnecessary suffering
It all begins with you – the individual. My field of expertise is helping people let go of self-inflicted suffering. We are all expert in the art of self-sabotage. Here are some examples.

11. Tolerance for obesity
Someone depressingly overweight consumes a diet high in sugar, fat and toxins.

It’s entirely possible to be overweight and happy. Only you can decide the weight that is right for you. Many people, however, complain bitterly about their weight. They won’t even get on a scale or look in the mirror.

These folks have a high tolerance for body discomfort, even though they hate it. The tolerance is so high that it is less painful to endure their as it is than to exchange their dietary and lifestyle habits for healthier ones.

12. Tolerance for personal abuse.
A tortured woman stays with the man who mistreats her.

So many women put up with SO MUCH from abusive men. These women have a super high tolerance for rejection, betrayal and mistreatment. Their tolerance is so high that they find it easier to put up with abuse than to face life on their own.

13. Tolerance for loneliness and emptiness
A lonely person avoids socializing and laments a solitary life.

Lots of people feel so alone in this world. They have a super high tolerance for loneliness, even though they don’t enjoy it. They routinely avoid socializing and making new friends because the loneliness is more comfortable than reaching out.

14. Tolerance for worthlessness
Someone with low self-esteem piles on with daily self-condemnation.

Some of us tolerate self-criticism, day in and day out. We’ve lived with it for so long that is doesn’t seem normal to be without it. That critical voice is like an emotional straightjacket. It keeps you from being emotionally free. Since the straightjacket has been our home for decades, we can’t seem to give it up.

15. Settling for personal mediocrity
Depressing mediocrity is often tolerated more than the perceived pressure of success and high responsibility. Thousands of mid-level managers, would-be entrepreneurs and trapped housewives dream of doing something really great with their lives, but are much more comfortable with their current lot. Tolerance for mediocrity is the culprit.

16. Intolerance for happiness
Nathaniel Branden called it happiness anxiety. This happens when you become happy, then anxious (because you know the happiness won’t last).

When bad news is just around the corner, you abandon the happy state in favor of hanging out where you are more comfortable – with your problems.

17. Tolerance of fear, anxiety and needless uncertainty
Some of us – even though we hate it – can tolerate loads of anxiety. So much so that we avoid doing what would calm us down, as if the fear were our friend.

For example, you have an upcoming speech to give. You are very nervous because you don’t want to look like a fool. Amazingly, you AVOID preparing the speech until the last minute, which virtually guarantees you won’t come off as well.

18. Tolerance for guilt
A wrongdoer feels horribly guilty, but persists in the wrongdoing. Why? Because he can tolerate a lot of guilt and would rather live with it than stop whatever cheating he is doing and work harder.

19. Tolerance for conflict
Things are going well in your marriage. Time to pick a fight! When things go smoothly, you can’t tolerate the warm fuzzies. You CAN handle the anger and sense of injustice that comes with emotional battle. You have a high tolerance for bad relationships.

20. Tolerance for being controlled
You have someone in your life that tells you what to do when, where and how. You hate this, but have an amazing tolerance for living this way (otherwise you would not live this way).

There’s A LOT you can do to avoid being controlled. You can draw the line. You can be more proactive and avoid the necessity of being monitored all the time. However, you opt for being controlled because it is familiar.

Let’s rethink tolerance
The truth is, so much of what we tolerate is nothing more than self-sabotage. We feel helpless, hopeless and afraid. We believe so strongly in suffering that it doesn’t occur to us that there are real choices.

It is possible to let suffering go, but NOT if you don’t understand and eliminate your tendency toward self-sabotage first. To do this, you MUST understand how it operates in your psyche. No one teaches this stuff in families, school or mainstream psychology, amazingly.

When you learn how your mind is clinging to all the wrong things, you can set yourself free. When you set yourself free, you can help set others free.

Read and learn more


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: